Nothing makes sense, I feel so dumb and hollow. The only permanent thing is the comfort of my bathrobe, sofa, and True Detective. You have to do something to achieve anything. Yet again I'm pushing my life away. I guess I hate McConaughey's character because it appeals to the exact thing he mentioned: feeling that everything matters. He is the character viewers are supposed to identify with, the misunderstood weirdo that unveiled the essence of life and acts like a cynical prick most of the time. I hate being coerced into thinking we might be alike. But I really feel that he has a point, which is awful, and probably is the reason or the effect of this sadness.
I feel like nothing matters anymore, like I'm bad at my job and there is nothing for me in the future. Which is dumb and probably not true